Even overseas, good news travels fast.
Thank you, Sandy. Thank you.
For more Sandra-tasticness, check out this clip where she pays tribute to Latina/o culture. It’s six minutes of your life that you will not regret. Really.
I, along with millions of others, waited with bated breath as envelopes were opened and my work as an Oreo was thankfuly confirmed!
(First, I must pause to say, let’s hear it for the interpretive dance number…am I right!!!)
So many good things in this year’s 82nd Annual Academy Awards Ceremony. Director Kathryn Bigelow was awarded as the first female to win Oscar for Best Director for her work on The Hurt Locker. And in precious news to all those who are trying to escape their ethnicity, Sandra Bullock won for Best Actress for her work in the Oreo-tastic film, The Blind Side.
Bonus points for screenwriter Geoffrey Fletcher and actress Mo’Nique for their work on Precious. Extra bonus points goes to ‘Nique for leading us into the final Barbara Walters interview with some weird talk about how she and her husband are allowed to have sex with other people and an up close and personal look at how she doesn’t shave her legs. Why limit the conversation to tasteful, reasonable topics? We have an image to uphold and thus work against, here!
Bonus, bonus, bonus points for her ending the segment, not with the poised Mo’Nique we saw at the Academy Awards, but for sassing it up, just to remind us that we really only want the Academy to be just so progressive. Otherwise, of colors look just like regular people and all of our work is in vain.
It’s great for women that the seal has been broken by Bigelow and that the nation can see that a woman is capable of directing a powerful, tense and gripping film with complex characters and a moving story.
Thank goodness then, that we are keeping of colors in the box that we as Oreos and Oreo adjacents need them to be in.
By awarding a screenwriter for writing about the worst of of colorness and an actress for playing the worst of colorness while also awarding another actress for taking care of of colors when (per the other film featuring black people that was nominated for an Academy Award) no one else can, the Academy has reminded all of us of just how great it will be to shun our skin and ascend into true Oreodom.
Nevermind that TBS leaves out a few key points of the story as writer Prairie Miller puts it:
“… The Blind Side excels at expressing the profound maternal affection and protective instincts Tuohy develops for this lost young soul, other troubling matters that come to light are skimmed over, and never quite resolved with dramatic assurance. In particular, the formal charges that were eventually leveled against Tuohy and Oher’s high school football coach Hugh Freeze, by the National Collegiate Athletic Association. And essentially, that the boy was being financially exploited by this family seeking legal guardianship over him. Along with Freeze, who eventually got a paid position at the college, where both pressured for his matriculation as a student participant in football.
Eventually Freeze was found in ethical violation, though the movie avoids a deeper exploration of rampant exploitation of ghetto youth in sports. A far better film this year that tackles those issues head on, is the Anna Boden/Ryan Fleck candid Dominican baseball drama indie, Sugar.”
Peccadilloes like legal quandaries are a small price to pay for keeping the social order in check.
Bonus points to me for DVRing this shindig so that I can watch both those fantastic pas de deux and see Sandy bring it home for me again and again and again.
The kind of invitation I’d been waiting for finally came. Embossed envelope withe the kind of wax seal I haven’t seen since my last Renaissance Festival. I was expecting to be asked to any number of red carpet events where I could rub sunburned elbows with the kind of people it does me good to be seen with.
Then I opened the envelope.
Such a tease you are, life, such a tease.
They are honoring The Blind Side, though. So, maybe they’re more Oreo-tastic than I thought.
On this Martin Luther King Jr., Day, The Oreo Experience would like to take a minute to thank a hero of the black community for showing us just how far we can come…if we have the right (read: the white) support.
And thus, a Creamy goes to the Hollywood Foreign Press for the Golden Globe they gave Sandra Bullock last night for her performance in The Blind Side. Breakout work by an unknown, but raw and heartfelt new talent Gabourey Sidibe, be damned (or for that matter, the ever-regal Helen Mirren, too). We need more white people to the rescue.
A follow up Creamy goes to the Hollywood Foreign Press for giving Mo’Nique a Golden Globe for her performance as a horribly abusive ghetto mom, and thus reminding us how terrible it is to be of color. They could have awarded Morgan Freeman for playing Nelson Mandela or Chiwetel Ejiofor for playing a smart and clever and thoughtful villain.
But, when they keep things consistent and reward of colors for portraying their worst and the ruling class for portraying their best, it really helps keep us Oreo hopefuls motivated. Thanks, HFPA. And by all means, don’t feel the need to cut your speech, our orchestra won’t play you off for a while.
PS…did you notice? Four of color nominees total (including all other categories if you’re curious, but not counting Penelope Cruz). Three of those four playing something/someone negative or frightening and/or unwelcome in your average saddlery. See, sucks to be an RPB.
In honor of Sandra Bullock’s tour de force, The Blind Side, making it to #2 at the box office this weekend (second only to vampire/werewolf mega sensation New Moon) The Oreo Experience is pleased to release some as yet unheard material from pre production.
While this song (recorded with white [natch] singer/songwriter Athena) unfortunately did not make it into the final soundtrack, I think it does a great job at showing why this movie is so important to an Oreo. Without movies like these showing us how RBP just can’t cut it on their own, they remind us why we fight so hard to be anything but an RBP.
Can’t get enough of this thematic material? I know I sure can’t! Gotta keep the Oreo fires burning with something. For more material that will remind you that RBP just can’t do it on their own and make you love to hate every drop of melanin you were born with, check out not only The Blind Side, but also, Dangerous Minds, Freedom Writers, O, Hardball, Up the Down Staircase, Step Up, Bring it On, Step Up 2: The Streets, Finding Forrester, Precious-Based on the Novel Push by Sapphire, Fighting the Odds: The Marilyn Gambrell Story, Hancock, Wildcats, The Gridiron Gang, Friday Night Lights, and Transformers 2-because even on a near-apocalypitc, robotic future, the black robots are the only ones who can’t read. Thanks, ruling class, we clearly, really owe you!
Listen up, kids. Did you think for one minute that maybe you didn’t really need to keep up the fight? Worried that your inner bleaching efforts were all in vain? That maybe, just maybe we didn’t need to lighten up a little?
Well, thanks again to Hollywood for reminding us that is not the case at all.
In the new movie, The Blind Side, Sandra Bullock saves a poor kid of color in that special way that only rich white
people can. Further kudos to pearly-skinned writer/director John Lee Hancock for telling the story of a black person in the very special way that only a rich white person can. Further rounds of applause for Warner Bros for leaving folks of color out of the major above the line positions on the script. That would only bring an uncomfortable verisimilitude to the whole process.
So keep your chins up and any natural inclinations at bay. We’re Marching on to Zion and with the right help, we’ll get there one day.