Fried Chicken Fail #343 – Popeye’s

We all know there are things that an Oreo is just not allowed to eat: watermelon, okra, certain flavors of froyo, yogurt more than 10 days past the expiration date and of course, fried chicken.

That’s why this new Popeye’s commercial was so upsetting. I know I’m not supposed to eat fried chicken, I know I should probably never look a Popeye’s franchise in the face. But this thing they’re selling is called chicken and there’s no way it can be.

what the holy eff?

I think you can still hear it screaming.

So can I eat it or not?!

What say someone accidentally brings this thing to an event. Let’s pretend that I’m starving at the corner of Hollywood and Wilcox and can’t possibly get across the street and this is all that’s available? Mayhaps one day I go on Fear Factor and have to eat one of these for a million dollars. Can I indulge?

Nothing about a chicken happens the way it appears in the Rip’n Chick’n basket. No parts of a pollo comes in a 6-pronged piece. Zero locations on a bird’s body look like this venus fly trap of a deep fried disaster.

The only things in nature that look like this fried are human hands, tarantulas and the boning of a Chinese hand fan. None of which are off menu for an Oreo. But just think how embarrassing it would be to bite into what you think is a perfectly harmless drawn and quartered Medusa head only to find out that you’re doing something worse than potentially being turned into stone: acting like an RBP and enjoying some down home L’siana cookin’.  UghBarf.

****

For Mor-eo Oreo: Follow The Oreo Experience on Twitter (@oreoexperience)

And subscribe on youtube!

Advertisements

3 comments

  1. Nothing wrong with watermelon, though an Oreo should serve such on Wedgewood, respectable china factory, family of the Darwins, ya know. Nicely abolitionist heritage and all.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s