Though I came by my Oreo-ness honestly (what choice did I have when my mom was an accountant, Dad was a chemical engineer and they listened to more NPR than Nat
King Cole), my decision to set aside ethnicity was solidified when I started watching movies and TV. On screen, the non-colors looked like they led such more intersting lives than of colors!
And movies today don’t let me down! Even from the trailers, you can totes tell how much more exciting it is when you can shed your melanin!
How Do You Know – Reese Witherspoon can’t figure out what she wan–My GOD, Paul Rudd is handsome
- Stuff Non-Colors Seem To Do In This Movie – wear cute dresses, have doormen, give people their space, compare themselves against the status quo, ride Segways, get indicted, find old flames, have complicated relationships, play baseball, wonder what love is all about, be really crass, add a twist of lemon to their cute cocktails, run from what they want, run toward what they want, stop traffic.
- Stuff Of-Colors Seem To Do In This Movie – Represent on the baseball team….I’d say this guy was an Oreo b/c he’s the only of color on the team (and in the movie?)…but it is a baseball team. I’d be more impressed with his Oreoness if it was lacrosse or hockey.
Tron: Legacy – Man Finds Himself Through Video Games
- Stuff Non-Colors Seem To Do In This Movie – Struggle with memories, refuse to wait around, ride motorcycles, own businessses, reveal information long held secret, develop cool tech, glow in the dark, have zero percent body fat, fly, strut.
- Stuff Of-Colors Seem To Do In This Movie – hey is that guy– oh, no, he’s not. That was just dark lighting and a beard.
I suppose it makes sense. This is a movie about a guy who goes inside of a video game. They’re already asking us to suspend our disbelief pretty heavily. Let’s not muddy it up by having of colors inside that video game. It’s make believe, not complete crazytown.
- Stuff Non-Colors Seem To Do In This Movie – be fancy rich, play golf, count their money, bend the rules, report the news, be chauffered.
- Stuff Of-Colors Seem To Do In This Movie – take a photograph, be disenfranchised, take another photograph.
Yogi Bear – Hmm, didn’t realize there was a market for this film.
- Stuff Non-Colors Seem To Do In This Movie – go camping, work in national parks.
- Stuff Of-Colors Seem To Do In This Movie – n/a
Wow! Even a talking bear with an eating disorder and boundary issues has more fun than of colors. It’s clear which life I’d rather have. Here’s to resolving to be an even better Oreo next year!