Two Truths and a White Lie

little-white-lies-fingers-crossed-behing-back-2-main_FullDo you want to play a game? 

You remember this camp/drinking game favorite: Two Truths and a Lie. The speaker makes three statements. Two of them are true, one of them is not. Your goal is to pick out the white lie. 

Play along and let’s see how you do. 

1.

  • A. My mother taught me to notice my status by playing a game with me at well-attended events called “Count the Black People.”
  • B. I sang contralto at my alma mater’s Madrigal Dinner Theater.
  • C. I was made to sing “I Wish I was in Dixie” with my elementary school choir.

2.

  • A. I downloaded some Kristen Chenowith this week.
  • B. I downloaded some 50 Cent this week.
  • C. I downloaded some Relient K this week.

3.

  • A. I attended a party in West Hollywood where I was the only person of color.
  • B. I attended a party in Downtown Burbank where I was the only person of color.
  • C. I attended a party in West Adams where I was the only person of color.

4.

  • A. I’ve sung Tori Amos’ “Cornflake Girls” at karaoke.
  • B. I’ve sung Jewel’s “Who Would Save Your Soul” at karaoke.
  • C. I’ve sung Dusty Springfield’s “Son of a Preacher Man” at karaoke.

5.

  • A. W.E.B Dubois was awarded the Lenin Peace Prize by the then Soviet Union.
  • B. Frederick Douglas taught himself to read by competing with white kids in the shipyard.
  • C. Marian Anderson was a mezzo-soprano.

THE LIES

1. B – I sang soprano in my college’s Madrigal Dinner Theater. Mom first taught me to play CTBP when we went to a Lipizanner Stallion showcase. Changed my life forever. How many black people were there at the event? Counting my mom and myself, 2. And, yes, as part of some very well conceived show in fifth grade, I sanglipizzaner-wfls-capriole-new(soprano, natch) along to “I wish I was in Dixie, hooray, hooray. In Dixieland, I’d make my stand to live and die in Dixie. Away, away, away down south in Dixie!”

2. C – The EP I was looking for wasn’t available. Oh, and 50–it was a gift…for a clearly questionable associate.

3. Haha! This is a trick question. At all of those parties, I was the only person of color. Yes, even in the hood, I can find the party where my people refuse to go.

4. A – The truth was, I sang Tori Amos’ “Crucify” at karaoke, not “Cornflake Girl.” Important side note: The only time I had a total karaokefail was singing “Son of  a Preacher Man.” I thought I was safe because Dusty’s so white, but preachers and their ilk are a big part of black culture. Seems even evoking the imagery and the very light soul runs were enough to have my song cut short. My apologies to the crowd. Next week, I’ll get back to my style and try “Taylor the Latte Boy.”

5. If you know the answer to this one, you’re playing the wrong game.

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2 comments

  1. 5. B? my retention generally sucks ducks, but i thought someone broke the law and taught him to read? (douglass with two s’s, i think.)

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